Look at the specs of the Fiat Seicento Sporting - front-wheel drive, 54hp, 93mph, 0-60 in just under 14 seconds with a following hurricane - and you might come to the conclusion that such a car has no place in PH.
But don't judge too hastily. As anyone who has been to the Geneva Show this year (which is most people) will tell you, small cars are all the rage these days, don't ye know. Fiat has been popping small cars out like peas for centuries. Its Seicento sprang forth in 1998 as the spiritual successor to the shoebox-sized Fiat 600. The Seicento was bigger, obviously, with a much bigger engine (relatively speaking), but it was still very ickle. Which of course is why Fiat set up its Seicento manufacturing facility in the Polish town of Tychy. Fact.
It's titchy and it was built in Tychy
Here's the PH-qualifying secret of small cars in general, and tinny old small Italian cars in particular. Very much like the Italian economy, they don't have much substance. That means they make the most of what power they've got. With a kerb weight of under 750kg, even the bog-stock pushrod 899cc Seicento could be whipped along at a surprising not to say alarming rate. It wouldn't look all that impressive from the outside, but it would feel it from behind the wheel, where you'd have a daft grin on your face like a Jack Russell that's just nicked the last boiled sweet. There's a lot to be said for getting your kicks at lower, wallet-friendly speeds. You'll get a buzz, and it still beats the bus.
As the average Italian has about as much respect for a proletarian car as the average Spaniard has for a donkey, all small Fiats were built to be mercilessly hammered about the place. Our Shed seems to have avoided this fate. It looks box fresh and therefore perfectly primed for a rude and possibly blazing finale in the hands of a crazed PHer.
2000-on cars like this should have the fuel-injected 1.1 FIRE engine, a doughty and determined little lump with a non-interference top end. To help you maximise every last ounce of its monstrous output, the Sporting model had lowered suspension and anti-roll bars along with swirly 13-inch 'steel look' alloys. You may not approve of the front end aero package (pfft) but this pre-facelift model does at least escape the later 'improvements' of clear indicator lenses and (to Shed's mind) even less successful bodykit.
Not quite as plush as last week's S-Class
In case you're wondering, that 'overpaint' look on the black side rubbing strip is actually factory-correct, and not the daubings of a cack-handed rattlecan artist. Not sure what Fiat was looking for there, some kind of stroboscopic speed effect maybe. Silver Sportings usually had a smudged orange strip, red cars a blue one. In hindsight, perhaps this wasn't the Seicento designer's proudest moment, but as someone once said, hindsight is always 20/20. And anyway, it was appropriate at the time. Sort of.
Shame the Sei' doesn't have the Cinquecento Sporting's red seatbelts. You'd be amazed the effect those have on the ladies. There's something very deep going on there: try The Lounge for more material on that.
Apart from the usual degradation issues that you'll always have on economy vehicles built more than a decade ago - at one point, UK Seicentos were retailing in warehouses at under £4K - this car should be cheap to run. You might experience rough idling as a result of leaky vacuum pipes or sticky throttles; fuel tanks can rust and the failure of Fiat power steering (where fitted) is common and expensive to fix.
But there are no red ignition key issues and the Sporting sits in insurance Group 7, just four notches above the basic model. Seeing as how the car only scored 1.5 stars in the Euro NCAP crash test, it's surprising that any insurers will cover it, but the real fear of what lies around the next corner is surely an integral part of any thrillseeker's agenda.
If you believe that fun behind the wheel doesn't have to be directly proportional to your actual rate of progress, the Seicento Sporting merits serious consideration as either a young PHer's first car or an old PHer's transport down Memory Lane. All you need is a firm grip on the steering wheel and a brick for the throttle pedal.
All Service History, Previously owned by same family until 2010, Exceptional Condition, MOT, Alloy Wheels, Electric Windows, Sunroof, CD Player, Airbag, Mature lady owner - Cherished Car.
