Every so often somebody shares a page of old adverts from the far-off days when car classifieds were printed on dead trees. Something that invariably triggers a wave of nostalgia for the time when two-door RS Cosworths looked overpriced at £12,000 and anyone searching for a Delta Integrale would have half a dozen to choose between.
With that in mind, it’s probably worth taking a screenshot of this week’s Brave Pill advert to return to in in future years. Because it likely isn’t long before the very idea of such a car existing, let alone being offered for such a reasonable price, will seem close to impossible. This is a stylish coupe that combines a charismatic V8, all-wheel drive and the novelty of a manual gearbox – and it could be yours for just £5,795.
Longer-established readers, or keen Googlers, will know that this is the second manual B8 S5 to feature here, the first having run almost exactly four years ago. That was back when Brave Pill still had that new column smell and plastic covers on its seats, and rarely celebrated anything less than the riskiest automotive offerings. At the time what was a 10-year-old Audi that had covered an unexceptional 95,000 miles was regarded by most commenters as being about as adventurous as an extra mild korma.
The passage of time and miles add a little more spice to our second S5. It’s grey where the first one was black, but has the same red interior that seems to have been a popular option for hot Audis at the time; which is at least modestly brave in itself. Our Pill passed its 15th birthday at the start of April, a point at which even the least troublesome cars are likely to grow crotchety as parts exceed life expectation. It has also covered 132,000 miles, a figure that won’t scare the bravehearts, but which is definitely well past the first flush of youth. I formerly owned a similarly aged Audi, a much less exciting A6 diesel, which I took from 140,000 to 180,000 miles over three years. Nothing big went wrong during that time, but lots of small things did, many of which were a real pain to put right.
The first generation S5 might be empirically old - but it really doesn’t look it. Walter da Silva was a fine design boss during his time with Audi, and the B8-generation A5/ S5 still feels like one of the highlights. Like the contemporary E92 BMW 3 Series and C209 Mercedes CLK it was more of a coupe-saloon than a coupe-coupe, the A4 underpinnings meaning it kept both squishable rear seat space and a respectable boot. While the basic A5 was a well-sculpted thing, the S5’s bigger wheels and deeper bumpers added visual muscle without turning it shouty.
That’s where the engine comes in. The S5 dates the time before designers declared war on exhausts, trying to either abolish them or dress them in ludicrous finishers. With the V8 B8 what you see is what you get - two pairs of tailpipes, one on each side of the bumper. Even the factory exhaust sounded pretty fruity on these, developing a hard edge whenever the engine was worked hard. And there are plenty of aftermarket systems to turn it louder.
The passage of time is also likely to have altered perspectives on the way the S5 drives. When it was new it was often portrayed as being fast but dynamically inert, the combination of V8 punch and all-wheel drive delivering bish-bosh performance where the rear-driven BMW 335i would be fighting a more amusing battle for traction. But with 15 years of hindsight, it seems unlikely the S5 would feel super quick to anyone with experience of more modern turbocharged equivalents; we live in a ludicrous world where low-5 second 0-60mph times are no longer especially fast.
Nevertheless, I’d be prepared to bet the S5’s hydraulically assisted steering now seems to possess much more sensation than it was given credit for in period, certainly compared to the muted electrically aided modern era. Then there’s the novelty of the manual gearbox, the S5 being one of few ways to experience it in conjunction with a V8 even when it was new.
My suggestion on the last S5 Pill that fuel economy would be poor - something the dealer selling our Pill references - had plenty of owners jumping to its defence, and reckoning they often saw figures far in advance of the official 22.8mpg. So that’s a bonus, but road tax is still the full whack £695 - more than 10 per cent of the car’s value every year - and running costs will inevitably be high.
This point is made by our Pill’s MOT history, with plenty of red amongst the green. The most recent test ran out in May, but the seller promises a fresh one. The last was clean but for a single advisory of a nail in a rear tyre. Further back there have been plenty more warnings of worn rubber, marginal brakes and a couple for that perennial BP favourite - ‘oil leak, but not excessive.’
More worrying, and confusing, was a fail in 2020 for an excessively corroded suspension mounting point. Strange as rust is rarely an issue on any 21st-century Audi, and much of the B8’s structure was made from high-grade high-strength steel. The fact the car recorded a clean pass later the same day suggests this wasn’t the sort of rot that used to keep welder-wielding mechanics in face scars but something that could be relatively easily sorted. In short, confusing.
The dealer selling our Pill admits the last owner bought it as part of a mid-life crisis to get owning something like this out of his system. Now it’s ready for its next willing victim. There seems no reason this S5 couldn’t help at least another couple of people through similar car-related bucket listing. There really won’t be much longer to enjoy cars like this.
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